As I sit in the cushy booth with my latte and remnants of the lemon pound cake on the table, I watch out the large floor to ceiling windows and see dozens of children running through the water shooting out of the ground, squealing and laughing without a care in the world. It doesn’t seem to faze them that its 112 degrees outside. The parents on the other hand, are sitting at the umbrella’d tables trying to catch the misters as they blow right over their heads, and sweat…profusely. Summertime in the great Southwest. At least we can take a deep breath and not feel like we are sucking in water from the deep blue sea. We may sear our lungs with the heat, but its a dry heat.
Normally, the a/c is blasting so cold, that you can see your breath and have to bundle up like its the middle of winter. Not today. For me, it’s perfect. The guy next to me, is in shorts and a tee shirt and the sweat is dripping down his brow. He keeps asking me if I think its hot. I shake my head and say “I think it feels perfect.” The ceiling fans are swirling at high speed and the pages of my journal keep flipping over. I grab my phone and plop it on the book to hold it down. Popping my ear buds in and cranking up the volume for my playlist, I dive in to the world of Olivia and Sam as they drive through the heart of New York City towards Long Island where they will be attending a church service. Sam has just introduced Olivia to “Betty,” his 1972 fully restored Pontiac Firebird. Should be an interesting drive.
Little does Sam know, that he will be meeting Olivia’s family for the first time…at church. On top of that, he will be attending a family Sunday Dinner afterwards. I had a great time with these chapters.
As I was doing some light editing, I realized that my story writing tends to be a lot of “telling” rather than “showing.” I am trying to use my 5 senses more when I write. Describing what I see, hear, feel, smell and taste seems easy enough, but it’s not. Telling something is just supplying information. Showing is painting a picture that the reader can see in their mind.
Stating that Sam is “tall,” “mad,” “tired,” or “sick,” is just supplying you with information. Facts.
If you read that others have to look up to Sam, or he had to duck his head down as he entered the room…then you would already know that Sam is tall.
Rather than telling you that Olivia is angry, I can show you by describing the vein popping out of her neck while she’s having a conversation with her brother or how her fists are clenched tightly. If the character is cold, show your reader by having the character pull his wool beanie down tighter on his head or wrap the scarf around her neck; pull the collar of his coat up higher. ( I think you catch my drift)
The author, Jerry Jenkins has made this statement to writers many times: “when you show, you don’t have to tell.” Letting my audience (readers) deduce what the character is feeling is a good thing. If I do it right, they will come to the same conclusion I did.
Plus…if we’re all honest, it makes for a much more entertaining story. I don’t pay $18.99 for a 350 page book that is just chapters and chapters of facts. Not if its a Christian Fiction book anyway. Even the Bible “shows” rather than just tells. The prophets that wrote their words down on scrolls, gave us some pretty vivid paintings for our mind to ponder. In other parts, its just the facts, ma’m. Example: The Ten Commandments!
I want my stories to be “transformational.” I realize that’s not a word in the dictionary, but one of my favorite authors, Ted Dekker, invented it. I was taking one of his classes and he changed my whole perspective on writing. In a nutshell, a story is a series of events involving worthy characters who change as a result of those events.
One of my favorite quotes from Ted, is the following:
“Write to transform your own life and invite the reader to join in the adventure with you.”
I love that. I have always wanted my stories to be something that changed the readers heart and mind in some way. Gave them hope when they felt despair; encouraged when they were in need; laughter when they were down or challenged them to be better, stronger, kinder. I love stories that follow the Hero’s Journey. Books, movies, plays…great ones, tend to follow that story telling. I think of Cecil B DeMille’s The Ten Commandments. The story of Moses. The story of transformation. Ben Hur…Judah’s story is one of transformation. Star Wars; The Lion King; Lord of the Rings; even Rocky! Best of all are the hero’s in the Bible. The list is long and amazing. Joshua, Abraham, Noah, Daniel, Ruth, Esther and on and on.
That’s my desire. To write in the style of the hero’s journey. A transformational journey. For both myself, the writer. For the character and for my readers.
As many of you know, I tend to work out my thoughts on paper (or laptop), so my blog posts are not always something as adventurous as an excerpt from my book or a renowned and thought provoking topic. Most times, it’s just me thinking out loud.
Pray with me that my writing journey will be something that is always and foremost, pleasing to the Lord and heartfelt and inspiring to those that read my stories.
Just thinking out loud,
Pam
Pam Torres | Author 